... faking extroversion

My little introvert batteries are flashing red

I just got back from perhaps the most draining weekend I’ve had so far as an author. Last Thursday, my friend Meredith and I drove three hours to Louisville for the Louisville Book Festival. We split an Airbnb, and since we knew we were sharing a sales table, we planned a gift basket giveaway that incorporated items tied into each of our books, in the hopes that it would prompt readers to want both of them.

Meredith and me at our table before the start of the festival, when we both still had energy

And it worked! We both sold out of copies in the festival bookstore, and had to run back to our Airbnb* on the second day in order to grab the extra just-in-case copies we’d brought from home. After hurriedly setting up consignment in the bookstore, we then proceeded to sell out of a bunch of those books as well. (Meredith sold out. I did not, because I had an absurd number of books thanks to a comically gigantic order I placed earlier in the year, when I had no idea what a “normal” number of books to have on hand was and WAY overshot.)

We also got a bunch of entries into our giveaway (congrats to winner Amy S.!) and new newsletter signups, so welcome, new subscribers! All is chaos here!

It was a good weekend, and we had fun. I’m glad I went (and doubly glad I had a friend there to help share the emotional load—it would have been exponentially more overwhelming by myself). I’m so grateful for everyone who stopped by our table to chat about and purchase our books, and so thankful for the new friends we made while we were there.

But for two introverts who prefer to spend a significant portion of our days sitting alone in silence, hand-selling all day for two days solid was draining. When we got back on Sunday afternoon, I did nothing for the rest of the day except watch TV in my bedroom, snuggled up with my dogs. My brain still feels somewhat gelatinous.

I’m gradually recovering, which is good because this weekend I am participating in WriterFest (tickets are still available; use code INSIDER50 for $50 off!), and then immediately flying to Florida for Thanksgiving. My parents have rented a big house on the beach in the panhandle, and this will be the first time that all of us—grandparents, siblings, nieces, and nephews—have all been together since the start of the pandemic.

It’s a lot of activity, a lot of putting on real clothes and brushing my hair and putting effort into looking like a human instead of a couch troll, a lot of spending time around other people and talking and being aware of my face and its tendency to look irritated or bored even when I am neither.

Sometimes people don’t believe I’m an introvert because I’m decent at social interaction. “But you seem so natural!" is a thing I’ve heard a lot. “You act so comfortable!”

Friends, I am faking it.

A lot of people think that introversion and extroversion is all about how socially awkward you are (or are not), whether or not you enjoy socialization, or how well you can carry a conversation. And while these can be indications of which way someone leans, introversion and extroversion is more about how you recharge your internal batteries.

After spending time with people, do you feel energized or exhausted? When you’re alone, do you find yourself feeling drained and need to go out for a boost of energy? Or are you more the type that can feel yourself gradually turning into a pumpkin the longer you socialize, and eventually need to excuse yourself to go recharge in solitude?

I am definitely the latter. I can be “on” as long as I need to (within reason), but afterward, I crash hard. Which makes the whole concept of “author events” funny, because one of the reasons I enjoy writing books is because it’s a thing I can do totally by myself. In my pajamas, preferably. And yet actually promoting those books often involves leaving my cozy home cave to go out into the world and interact with people. Which I do genuinely enjoy, and is also a requirement if I want to be able to keep writing books (or at least keep selling them).

I just sometimes wish there was such a thing as a human backup battery.

This was very nearly dinner after day 1 of the Louisville Book Festival, until we remembered that takeout existed. We were so tired.

Anyway, if you stopped by my table with Meredith this past weekend in Louisville, thank you for taking the time to chat with us and consider our books. If you bought one or both of them, thank you again! And if one of both of us seemed like zombies, I promise it was us, not you.

If you haven’t grabbed it yet, I’LL STOP THE WORLD is currently on sale through the end of the month in all formats on Amazon. (Remember, books make great Christmas presents!)

Speaking of presents, did you know I have a Bookshop.org storefront? You can buy my books, of course (including preordering YOU SHOULDN’T BE HERE), but I’ve also put together lists of my favorite novels, nonfiction, books my friends have written, my family’s favorite children’s books, and banned books I’ve either read or are on my radar. And of course, every purchase on Bookshop.org helps support independent bookstores. Check it out if you want to get a jump on your holiday shopping!

As for me, I’m wrapping up edits on YOU SHOULDN’T BE HERE and eagerly awaiting when I can reveal the cover (it is so cool, y’all).

I’ve probably got at least one more newsletter in me in 2023, because I definitely want to share the cover when it drops. And maybe I’ll even have more updates (on what? Who knows! Lots of things are in the air right now, and I never know when something is going to land).

But after that one, I will probably hibernate until 2024. Just being realistic.

Until next time, here’s to comfortable shoes, fluffy blankets, and full-size candy bars. Talk to you soon.

*Actually, I wound up running back to the Airbnb twice, because the first time I forgot the car keys. Fortunately it was just half a mile away. Unfortunately I was wearing heels.

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